My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she’s as old as I am. Then she lies about my age. Anonymous Age, Aging, Funny, Middle Age You May Also Like Consultants are people who borrow your watch and tell you what time it is, then walk off with the watch. By Robert Townsend Consultants, Funny, Sarcastic If thine enemy wrong thee, buy each of his children a drum. By Chinese proverb Funny, Light, Quotable, Revenge The secret of managing is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are undecided. By Casey Stengel Bosses, Funny, Leadership, Management The basic fact about human existence is not that it is a tragedy, but that it is a bore. It is not so much a war as an endless standing in line. By H. L. Mencken Boredom, Funny, Life, Sarcastic Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you haven’t committed. By Anthony Powell Age, Aging, Old age, Sad The easiest way to stay awake during an after-dinner speech is to deliver it. By Herman Herst Jr. Funny, Public speaking You May Also Like from Anonymous A camel is a racehorse built by committee. By Anonymous Committees, Funny, Sarcastic Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is quite so satisfying as an income tax refund. By Anonymous Economics, Taxes Gresham’s Law: Bad money drives good money out of circulation. By Anonymous Credit, Economics, Money It takes seventeen muscles to smile and forty-three to frown. By Anonymous Attitude, Happy, Hope, Smile Enthusiasm is more important than any other commodity. It will find solutions when none are apparent, and it will achieve success where none is thought possible. By Anonymous Enthusiasm, Inspirational, Optimism, Powerful, Uplifting Work is the curse of the drinking class. By Anonymous Drink, Work
Consultants are people who borrow your watch and tell you what time it is, then walk off with the watch. By Robert Townsend Consultants, Funny, Sarcastic
If thine enemy wrong thee, buy each of his children a drum. By Chinese proverb Funny, Light, Quotable, Revenge
The secret of managing is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are undecided. By Casey Stengel Bosses, Funny, Leadership, Management
The basic fact about human existence is not that it is a tragedy, but that it is a bore. It is not so much a war as an endless standing in line. By H. L. Mencken Boredom, Funny, Life, Sarcastic
Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you haven’t committed. By Anthony Powell Age, Aging, Old age, Sad
The easiest way to stay awake during an after-dinner speech is to deliver it. By Herman Herst Jr. Funny, Public speaking
Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is quite so satisfying as an income tax refund. By Anonymous Economics, Taxes
It takes seventeen muscles to smile and forty-three to frown. By Anonymous Attitude, Happy, Hope, Smile
Enthusiasm is more important than any other commodity. It will find solutions when none are apparent, and it will achieve success where none is thought possible. By Anonymous Enthusiasm, Inspirational, Optimism, Powerful, Uplifting