An individual starts off by facing his problem with resolution, but a convention saves the resolution for the end. Anonymous Conventions, Funny, Individuals, Resolution You May Also Like We sell sex. It’s never going to go out of style. By Bob Guccione Funny, Marketing, Sex I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. :) By Joe E. Lewis Diet, Dieting, Funny Love is like the measles—all the worse when it comes late in life. By Douglas Jerrold Funny, Love, Relationship, Romantic If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf. By BOB HOPE Funny, Golf When a person tells you “I’ll let you know”—you know. By Olin Miller Decision, Funny, Indecision Two elderly women are at a Catskills mountain resort and one of ’em says, “Boy, the food at this place is really terrible.” The other one says, “Yeah, and such small portions.” By Alvy, in Annie Hall, screenplay by Woody Allen and Marshall Brickman Food, Funny You May Also Like from Anonymous First do no harm (primum non nocere) By Anonymous Life, Wise Since the crash, my broker sleeps like a baby. He wakes up every two hours and cries. By Anonymous Brokers, Funny, Sarcastic, Stock market, Wall-Street Always expect the worst, and when it comes, make the best of it. By Anonymous Motivational, Optimist During uprisings, the tendency is to throw the baby out with the bathwater. By Anonymous Revolution At twenty, we don’t care what the world thinks of us; at thirty, we worry about what it’s thinking of us; at forty we discover it isn’t thinking about us at all. By Anonymous Age, Aging, Funny, Life, Middle Age Anyone’s a fool who doesn’t try to live up to his dreams and abilities. By Anonymous Dreams, Inspirational, Positive, Potential, Uplifting
I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. :) By Joe E. Lewis Diet, Dieting, Funny
Love is like the measles—all the worse when it comes late in life. By Douglas Jerrold Funny, Love, Relationship, Romantic
If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf. By BOB HOPE Funny, Golf
Two elderly women are at a Catskills mountain resort and one of ’em says, “Boy, the food at this place is really terrible.” The other one says, “Yeah, and such small portions.” By Alvy, in Annie Hall, screenplay by Woody Allen and Marshall Brickman Food, Funny
Since the crash, my broker sleeps like a baby. He wakes up every two hours and cries. By Anonymous Brokers, Funny, Sarcastic, Stock market, Wall-Street
At twenty, we don’t care what the world thinks of us; at thirty, we worry about what it’s thinking of us; at forty we discover it isn’t thinking about us at all. By Anonymous Age, Aging, Funny, Life, Middle Age
Anyone’s a fool who doesn’t try to live up to his dreams and abilities. By Anonymous Dreams, Inspirational, Positive, Potential, Uplifting