Never pride yourself on knowledge. Remember, even a head of iceberg lettuce knows more than you do. It knows whether or not that light really does go out when the refrigerator door shuts. Anonymous Funny, Humbleness, Knowledge, Modesty You May Also Like Every American thinks he’s alone on the continent. By Philip Slater Funny, Marketing Figures won’t lie, but liars will figure. By Charles H. Grosvenor (attrib.) Accountants, Accounting, Facts, Funny, Lying If only I had a little humility, I would be perfect. By Ted Turner (attrib.) Egotism, Funny, Narcissism He writes so well he makes me feel like putting the quill back in the goose. By Fred Allen Funny, Praise You know you’re getting old when everything hurts, and what doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work. By Anonymous Age, Aging, Funny, Middle Age My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she’s as old as I am. Then she lies about my age. By Anonymous Age, Aging, Funny, Middle Age You May Also Like from Anonymous A talent is both gift and obligation. By Anonymous Talent Anyone’s a fool who doesn’t try to live up to his dreams and abilities. By Anonymous Dreams, Inspirational, Positive, Potential, Uplifting Work is the curse of the drinking class. By Anonymous Drink, Work Leadership casts a long shadow. By Anonymous Leadership Hot heads and cold hearts never solve anything. By Anonymous Daily quotes, Life Peace makes plenty. By Anonymous Peace
Figures won’t lie, but liars will figure. By Charles H. Grosvenor (attrib.) Accountants, Accounting, Facts, Funny, Lying
If only I had a little humility, I would be perfect. By Ted Turner (attrib.) Egotism, Funny, Narcissism
He writes so well he makes me feel like putting the quill back in the goose. By Fred Allen Funny, Praise
You know you’re getting old when everything hurts, and what doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work. By Anonymous Age, Aging, Funny, Middle Age
My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she’s as old as I am. Then she lies about my age. By Anonymous Age, Aging, Funny, Middle Age
Anyone’s a fool who doesn’t try to live up to his dreams and abilities. By Anonymous Dreams, Inspirational, Positive, Potential, Uplifting
